an ode - sixty reasons no.

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an ode - sixty reasons no.

Post by juno on 17/5/2012, 17:19

We contributed to each other’s madness. She, thrown by the push and pull of my hurricane; I, rooted in a cage made just for me, a cage that she could leave and summon at will. I lost parts of myself in her dreams, her nonsensical mutterings, her power hungry search and the disaster of a child still inside and she was bound to me in some strange way, some unspoken, strange way. She referred to it as a spell, and I laugh, scoff. Once I wanted to be rid of her, to scrub her clean from my bones and to deny her existence, but now, I’m not so sure. Acceptance is heavy, maybe she will always be there, somewhere, not as a force overriding my life but as a reminder of years lost. Because in the end, they were still years lived. I do not accept her madness — I accept her. I do not succumb to her — I acknowledge her. And if this is what is left, these small glimmers of light as we walk endlessly past one another over and over, it’s okay. It’s really okay. We’re just both finding our way, we all are. At the finish line, perhaps that’s all I need from her — small glimmers of light as I find my way.

juno
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